Why Would Mr. Hashanah Affect Your Schedule?

This is an email that’s making the rounds of the entertainment community.  It’s from a junior assistant at Dreamworks to another assistant:

I Want Dance Party Friday

I wish all local news were like this local news.

Doug Christie… Financial Advisor!

VS.
The US economic system is teetering on the brink. Things are crashing down around us. One man has a plan and that man is… former NBA guard Doug Christie?

The total cost of the US Governement bailouts under proposal: $1.2 trillion

Steve Christie’s share: $205,520

I’m feeling better already.

From the Wall Street Journal:

Former NBA guard Doug Christie and his wife have called for as much to help out in this time of financial distress. The couple put out a press release late Tuesday to announce that they will purchase 3,000 shares of corporate stock to help with what they termed “the AIG financial crisis.” In addition to their cash, the release said, “the Christies…have graciously used their star appeal to bring awareness to the issue.”

…

“We encourage all our fellow men and woman to buy at least two stocks to help with the global economic crisis,” said Jackie Christie. “We want everyone to step up and help in any way that they can. This is a huge crisis we face, but together we can make a difference. Do not just sit by and watch.”

I Support Federally Mandated Orgasms Too

How the *&^*& did this guy get elected? Can you imagine who was running against him?

This was from the maiden speech by Australian Parliamentarian Jason Wood.

Oh Tina Fey… I love you

God Is Cancelled

Reason #37 To Love Jesse Ventura

I like Jesse Ventura. I like him when I was a kid and he was a wrestler. I loved him when he didn’t have time to bleed in Predator. I liked him when he was governor of Minnesota. He was a straight shooter, a pragmatist and a true neo-libertarian. Here is one example of why I love him.

From Wikipedia’s entry about Ventura’s time as governor:

Ventura had a difficult relationship with the local media. He referred to them as “media jackals,” a term that even appeared on the required press passes to enter the governor’s press area.

Bulgaria gives up 139 shots on goal in 82-0 women’s hockey loss

It is a little unclear how this can happen. I’m pretty sure that my high school hockey team could have held the New York Rangers to 50…

From ESPN.com:

There’s the “agony of defeat.” And then there’s this women’s ice hockey score from the European Olympic pre-qualifying tournament: Slovakia 82, Bulgaria 0.

That’s correct: eighty-two goals for Slovakia, none for Bulgaria.

The International Ice Hockey Federation said the result, from a game played Saturday at the tournament in Liepaja, Latvia, set a record score for a women’s IIHF-sanctioned event. It was not the all-time record for futility, however; that is still held by Thailand, which lost 92-0 to South Korea in the 1998 Asia-Oceania U18 Championship.

Slovakia, which won all four of its games at the tournament, outshot Bulgaria 139-0, scoring on 58.9 percent of their shots on goal. They averaged one goal every 44 seconds.

Bulgaria trailed 7-0 after 5 minutes, 19-0 after 10 and 31-0 at the end of the first period.

The drubbing capped a woeful showing for the Bulgarian women, who also lost 30-1 to Croatia and 41-0 to Italy in earlier games.

Favorite New Expression: The Frozen Chosen

I stumbled across this quote and loved it. Apparently the Frozen Chosen is a common term up there.

“Homerun!” Larry Greenfield, the California director of the Republican Jewish Coalition, wrote me via e-mail five hours after McCain’s announcement. “Governor Palin has a very close relationship with the Jewish community of Alaska, with Chabad (Rabbi Greenberg) and with AIPAC. She is close to the Frozen Chosen!”

$50K For Jews To Move To Alabama

Something about this just doesn’t feel right…

From the AP:

DOTHAN, Ala. – Larry Blumberg is looking for a few good Jews to move to his corner of the Bible Belt. Blumberg is chairman of an organization offering Jewish families as much as $50,000 to relocate to Dothan, an overwhelmingly Christian town of 58,000 that calls itself the Peanut Capital of the World. Get involved at Temple Emanu-El and stay at least five years, the group’s leaders say, and the money doesn’t have to be repaid.

More Jews are living in the South than ever — about 386,000 at last count in 2001, according to Stuart Rockoff, a historian at the Goldring/Woldenberg Institute of Southern Jewish Life in Jackson, Miss. But young Jews are leaving small places like Dothan in favor of cities like Atlanta and Birmingham, Rockoff said, and dozens of small-town synagogues have closed.

“A lot of the older people have died, and not many of the younger ones have stayed,” said Thelma Nomberg, a member of the Dothan temple who grew up in nearby Ozark, where she was the only Jewish student in public school in the 1940s. “We are dying.”