Soccer Team vs. Naked Man On Plane… Soccer Team Wins

VS.

Please note: the phrase “emerge naked from one of the plane’s restrooms” is never followed by anything good. From the Associated Press:

Members of the New England Revolution of Major League Soccer were among those who grabbed the passenger near an exit door, FBI spokesman Gary Johnson said. Tie wraps were placed on the man, whose name was not immediately released. He was taken into custody in Oklahoma City and placed under psychiatric evaluation, Johnson said…

Craig Tornberg, the soccer team’s general manager, said he confronted the man as soon as he saw him emerge naked from one of the plane’s restrooms.

“I said he should get back into the bathroom and put on his clothes,” Tornberg said after the plane landed in Los Angeles. “He said something strange to me. He said, ‘I don’t hear you. I don’t see you.'”

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Free Nelson Mandela (from the list of known terrorists)

Apparently Nelson Mandela will turn 90 on July 18th. In order to celebrate that event, the United States congress has decided to remove him from a list of known terrorists. Happy Birthday!!! From the article:

Rep. Donald Payne, a New Jersey Democrat, told the Africa Society late on Wednesday that removing organizations from the terrorist list was an administrative matter that had taken too long, adding: “We’re trying to make sure that he is not a terrorist when we celebrate his 90th birthday.”

This process has taken seven years. Once again, the Department of Homeland Security has got our back. Good job guys.